This is a compilation of actual student GCSE answers.
(GCSE is the British Secondary School exam for 16 year olds.)
1. Soon the Constitution of the United States was adopted to secure domestic hostility. Under the constitution the people enjoyed the right to keep bare arms.
2. Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother
died in infancy, and he was born in a
log cabin which he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves
by signing the Emasculation Proclamation. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln
went to the theatre and got shot in his seat by one of the
actors in a moving picture show. The believed assinator was John Wilkes Booth,
a supposedly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.
3. Meanwhile in Europe, the enlightenment was a reasonable time. Voltaire
invented electricity and also wrote a
book called Candy.
4. Gravity was invented by Issac Walton. It is chiefly noticeable in the autumn when the apples are falling off the trees.
5. Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number
of children. In between he
practised on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750
to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel.
Handel was half German half Italian and half English. He was
very large.
6. Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote
loud music. He took long walks in
the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827
and later died for this.
7. The French Revolution was accomplished before it happened and catapulted
into Napoleon. Napoleon wanted
an heir to inherit his power, but since Josephine was a baroness, she couldn't
have any children.
8. The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire's in the East and the sun sets in the West.
9. Queen Victoria was the longest queen. She sat on a thorn for 63 years. She was a moral woman who practised virtue. Her death was the final event which ended her reign.
10. The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts inventions.
People stopped reproducing by hand
and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steamboat caused a
network of rivers to spring up.
Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred
men.
11. Louis Pasteur discovered a cure for rabbis. Charles Darwin was a naturalist
who wrote the Organ of the
Species. Madman Curie discovered radio. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx
brothers.
12. The First World War, caused by the assignation of the Arch-Duck by an analyst, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history.